You’re midway through your job interview and you’re feeling relaxed and confident. You came prepared and it’s paying off. But then suddenly, Wham! — the interviewer throws out a question that makes you pause and wonder if you actually heard it correctly. In your head, you’re asking “How could this person possibly consider this an appropriate question to ask any female candidate?”
Gender-bias continues to pervade our workforce. And, as seen in the recruitment arena, women continue to encounter instances in which they’re asked questions that pry into their personal lives. A recent study found that 42 percent of women have been asked inappropriate questions in a job interview.
It’s a good idea to know what questions you aren’t required to answer in interviews and prepare in advance how you can adeptly avert them. For example, questions about your plans to start a family or about your plans for retirement if you’re of a mature age are out of bounds.
Federal laws offer protection from discrimination based on pregnancy, or taking leave to take care of a newborn, a sick child, or an aging parent. Other laws protect against age or race discrimination. But, unless an employer blurts out “You’re too old,” or “Your family status precludes you from the travel that the job requires,” it’s difficult to prove discrimination.
Deflect questions about family status.
Questions related to your family, or plans for a family, are not only off-base, but illegal. Imagine an interviewer asking that question of a male candidate — unlikely, right? So why should women be expected to field these questions about family status. You may be able to deflect it by asking the interviewer, “What is your concern in asking that question?” You can then address whatever issue they share (something like, “Mothers often have to put their child’s needs before their work responsibilities”), providing an answer about how you pride yourself on your ability to juggle multiple responsibilities.
Pro Tip: Tell the interviewer about a specific time when a conflict arose and how you handled it. Offer references from your last job to back you up.
Don’t fall for the “this or that” trap.
Look for the hidden agenda behind questions with only two answer choices: “Does your husband work or is he a stay at home dad?” Implicit in the question are several out-of-bound topics — whether you’re married, whether you’re the primary bread winner, whether you have children, and whether you may have issues with your children’s daycare. You can steer away from a specific answer with something general like, “I enjoy my career and am a hard worker.” Or you can give a playful answer. “As the CEO of my household, I’ve delegated some of the responsibilities to others in my family.” No matter how you answer this question, the trick is not to get defensive.
Pause a moment.
If you’re asked a question that has absolutely no relevance to your abilities — like: “This job requires some stamina. Do you think you have the endurance for it?” — give yourself a moment before you respond. Blurting out the first thing that comes to mind may not serve you well. Try to connect your answer to your task at hand, which is selling yourself. “I don’t expect my physical abilities to interfere with my performance. I’m a high-energy individual.”
Stay away from self-disclosure.
Be on the lookout for questions with a personal overtone that could lead you to provide too much personal information. If the prospective employer asks, for example, to list three adjectives that describe you, remind yourself that this is within a professional context. Don’t rattle off the adjectives your BFF would use to describe you and that could feed into their gender bias. Whatever adjectives you choose, they should describe your professionalism, so think in advance what they should be.
Show your clever side.
Some of those devious interview questions — like, “Are you a Gen X or Millennial?” — may be disguised as simple banter but have a hidden agenda. Try to have a little fun with them without taking the bait. Laughingly reply, “I’m a Scorpio (or whatever your astrological sign is)” and then shift to your wealth of experience.
Beware of discriminatory inquiries.
Employers don’t need to know the nationality of their job candidates. But they do need to know whether they are legally allowed to work in the U.S. It’s actually illegal if they ask, “Where are you from?” Still, if they appear to ask it as only a friendly question out of naivete, you can answer simply, “I’ve been living in the United States for X years. What about you?” Or, you can choose to address the elephant in the office and respond, “I’ve lived in a few places, but I’m legally allowed to work in the U.S. if that’s what you’re asking.”
Steer them back on track.
While a few casual questions are to be expected, if the employer begins to treat the job interview like a first date with questions verging on the too personal, steer the interview back on the right track. Use your pluck, poise, and aplomb. Be sure to smile as you say, “I was wondering if you could tell me a little more about what skills you’re looking for in an employee.”
Even if it’s the first interview you’ve landed in weeks, you need to pay close attention to inklings of poor protocols or employee disrespect that come out in your interview process. It could be a sign that the company won’t be a good fit for you. That said, it’s generally a good idea to try to get the job first. Be offered the job and decide whether or not its drawbacks outweigh the pain of seeking employment.
This guest post was authored by Vicky Oliver
Vicky Oliver is a leading career development expert and the multi-best-selling author of five books, including 301 Smart Answers to Tough Interview Questions (Sourcebooks 2005), named in the top 10 list of “Best Books for HR Interview Prep,” and Bad Bosses, Crazy Coworkers & Other Office Idiots (Sourcebooks, 2008). She is a sought-after speaker and seminar presenter and a popular media source, having made over 901 appearances in broadcast, print and online outlets. Vicky Oliver is the Nonfiction Editor at LIT Magazine, the Journal of the New School Masters in Fine Arts Creative Writing, and teaches essay writing at the New York Writers Workshop. For more information, visit vickyoliver.com.
